Duduzile Sokhela Life Development Institute


Within The Private Spaced of Black South African Women


Within the Private Spaces of Black South African Women is an exploration of the difficulties and hardships black South African women face on a daily basis. Life as a black South African woman can be full of obstacles but is how we come to terms with our differences and overcome our challenges together that makes us strong.

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This book is not generalizing by implying that all black South African women are the same and behave the same or battling with multiple issues in certain areas of their lives, but reality has shown that the majority of Black South African women are at war with own selves. It’s a painful and sad reality that cannot be ignored. The book merely points to issues that are rife, happening in practice and are gaining momentum in the private space of the majority of black South African women and gradually becoming a daily norm.

Within the private space of black South African women there seem, to be a mixture of feelings, on the other hand there seem to be love, wisdom, intelligence, sincerity, humility, sense of humour, independence, being considerate, accommodating, efficiency, effectiveness, reaching out to other women and competency, reaching out to other fellow sisters,

Within the very same private space of black South African women there seem to be anger, hatred, self-centredness, isolation, intolerance, overly sensitive, insecurity, negativity, feelings of inadequacy, feelings of hopelessness, grudge, empty pride, blame, competition, anguish, betrayal, dishonesty, disloyalty, impatience, mistrust, cold war, undermining, disrespect, feelings of un recognition, disappointments, pretence, lack of empathy, inefficiency, incompetency, culture of dependency, pathetic lies, ignorance, I don’t care attitude, feelings of uncertainty, feelings of being lost, feelings of entitlement, a feeling of not being loved, as well as neglect and abandonment.  The list is endless, too way far to imagine. Where are we heading under all these circumstances sisters? We must definitely be heading somewhere because where ever there is a way there is a will. What kind of Will is every woman choosing, is a contentious issue that remains to be seen and unfolded? Let’s face it once and for all with no offence, the majority of Black South African women are living in a doom world, they are living in tornado and disastrous private space. All these feelings are ravaging and eating on black South African women in their private space. Is there cold war mainly found within the private space of black African women more than it is in the private space of our counterpart inter alia Whites, Indians, and coloureds?

Should we have once and for all an open public debate about all these feelings found in the private space of my black South African sisters? We never talk about these feelings but knowing very well that they are the order of the day and exist in real life.

You ask yourself as to how do we tolerate each other every day and how do we find each other’s peaceful, and compromising private space in the midst of all these existing feelings? Find out as I unpack the contentious issues engulfing the private space of black South African women. And how as black South African women can proceed from here to finding each other better and well, as well as finding peace within ourselves and proceed from there.


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